Ten Weeks

Celebrating with a birthday cigar (bully stick)

In honor of his 10-week birthday (in other words, because I was too chicken to do it myself), Shadow visited a groomer today to have his nails clipped. The whole procedure took about five minutes, and he spent the whole time in my arms because he's still in that low-immunity puppy phase.

Yesterday afternoon, he enjoyed a visit from another puppy momma, who told me to give him a small treat immediately after he "eliminates" (by all means, if you have a better phrase for this let me know at laurashadow219@gmail.com) to cure his hatred of going outside when it's time. So far, it seems to be catching on!

Like "mother," like "son," we learned this week that Shadow despises the rain and cold, but the whole family is looking forward to a warm, beautiful weekend. And because the sun brings out the amazing blue-ness of his eyes, the forecast calls for lots of photos  :)

If dogs could roll their eyes and say, "Really? Do you really need another picture of me, mom?"

Get the latest immediately by following LauraShadow on Twitter.

Did you miss something fun?

Video: Singin' in Shadow's Room

Photos: Shadow Gets Pretty

Video: Silver Lab Puppy Meets Kong

Video: Shadow the Silver Lab Comes Home

Video: Singin' in Shadow's Room

If I didn’t know any better, I’d say someone snuck into the house in the middle of the night last week and replaced our sweet-tempered Shadow with a crazy dog for a few days… but then early this week brought our easygoing guy back.

By Friday, Shadow’s separation anxiety, constant accidents, nipping, outright refusal to be guided by a leash, and inability to sleep more than an hour at a time had taken a toll on me and Chris. On Saturday, as I reported earlier this week, we began full-on crate training, meaning he would spend a majority of time in his “room.”

Since then, we’ve had TWO completely accident-free days, he still loves the crate, and I’ve been able to leave him for 45 minutes at a time without worry that he’ll cry his cute little head off. For me, it has made all the difference, allowing me to get things done without fear of a soiled floor and enabling him to rest or play safely and happily on his own.

Accidents still happen (one actually occurred as I was taking a break from typing this), but compared to last week (4-5 a day), but they are FAR less frequent.

For anyone interested in crate training – which is named everywhere but rarely explained in detail – this is what we do:

Shadow now sleeps in his crate in the living room (no longer in the bedroom). Last night, in an unprecedented achievement, he actually slept from 11:30-5:30 a.m. straight.

When he wakes up, he goes outside. About 10-15 minutes after he eats or drinks, he goes outside. After waking up from a nap, he goes outside. If he won’t go outside or he falls asleep but I know he just drank a half-bottle of water, I can either watch him like a chained up hawk like I did last week or I can carry him to the crate. (Guess which one I choose.) When he wakes up or decides he wants out, he goes outside. Crisis averted. It makes for a happy puppy and a happy owner.

When he’s out he’s either eating, playing under my or Chris’ supervision, resting after having emptied himself, or training. He’s been doing the latter (sit/stay, anti-nipping, leash etiquette, fetch) 3-4 times a day for 10-15 minutes, and has shown marked improvement in all categories.

A final note on crate training: By not always closing the door, Shadow has come to see the crate as his bed, often going in or staying there voluntarily. Almost daily, he simply plops down, chews his bully stick and hums to himself (see video on YouTube or below) while I write on the other side of the room, or even in another room. He is never placed in the crate as a punishment.

I can barely believe he’ll be 10 weeks old tomorrow, but if I were a teacher I’d say he passed nine weeks with flying colors.

Did you miss something fun?

Photos: Shadow Gets Pretty

Video: Silver Lab Puppy Meets Kong

Video: Shadow the Silver Lab Comes Home

Shadow Gets Pretty

Despite an initial attempt to flee (above), Shadow grumpily but obediently resigned himself to getting a bath on Sunday. After drying beneath a snuggly blanket in his crate (below), he greeted some extended family members with super soft fur and a powder fresh scent. Needless to say, he was welcomed right into the pack.

Did you miss something?

Video: Silver Lab Puppy Meets Kong

Video: Shadow the Silver Lab Comes Home

Progress Report: Day Five

Crate Training Saves the Day

Crate Training Saves the Day

Crate Training, you rock. Whoever invented you, kudos up the wazoo.

Since shifting to full-on crate training on Saturday, Shadow has had two -- count 'em, TWO -- accidents in the house. Compare that to nine total on Thursday and Friday.

Why the long road? Despite all the books I read about welcoming a new puppy, I made a major mistake the first week Shadow was home: I became a helicopter puppy mom. So concerned about making him feel loved and welcome and happy, I ignored what he really needed -- sleep and his own space.

Sure, his crate was right there all week, waiting for his occasional interest. But he seemed to prefer the carpet and my lap. I wanted him to be happy, so I let him wander almost freely -- with a five-foot-six hawk always at his heels. In reality, all this did was set the stage for innocent but damaging accidents and sometimes frazzled reactions from Shadow's humans.

My unwavering willingness to play was also well intentioned but misguided. I assumed that if Shadow wanted to follow me around the house or chew on his third bully stick under the coffee table, I would be a bad (or at least boring) mother not to oblige. Sure, I let him sleep when he tuckered himself out, but I should have actively encouraged him to rest more often. Would a typical eight-year-old put himself to bed at 8 o'clock if he wasn't hounded to do so by his parents? No. Neither did Shadow, and he as a puppy is supposed to sleep 18 hours a day. 

So Saturday we moved the divider within the crate, fluffed his bed, and let him be. I may be less than 10 feet away most of the time, but now I can leave the room without him screaming (hooray!), get some work done without balancing an 18-pound ball of fur in my lap, and ration both the Nature's Miracle odor remover and my sanity. 

Why everyone should try crate training:

1 - It prevents accidents from occurring in difficult places such as on rugs, which can lead to frazzled owners and unsure puppies.

2 - It teaches puppies how to "hold it," as dogs don't like to soil their own sleeping places.

3 - It gives them a comfortable designated space that is truly their own.

4 - It encourages the appropriate amount of sleep for a growing Labrador puppy.

5 - He's all that more playful when he's out and well rested!

Did you miss something?

Video: Silver Lab Puppy Meets Kong

Progress Report: Day Five

Video: Shadow the Silver Lab Comes Home

Video: Shadow Meets Kong

Now that he's nine weeks old, we started seriously crate training Shadow on Saturday. He's been great so far, and the accidents (which reached five on Friday) have plummeted. Plus, he seems to love his cozy little home.

In a while we'll give him his first bath since leaving the breeder. That should be interesting...

Shadow Turns Nine (weeks)

Human sleep hours: SIX   (Score! Best since Shadow's arrival!)

Puppy sleep hours: 12   (seven daytime naps in addition to his six hours overnight)

Puppy accidents: Four   (best yet, but so far we've got two for Friday and it's only 11:30 a.m.)

Shadow plays with his Kong underneath his favorite coffee table

Today is Shadow's nine week birthday, and he's definitely done a lot of growing (aside from what I'll estimate to be five pounds) since he came home with Chris and I nearly a week ago.

While "down" still seems quite elusive, Shadow recognizes the "sit" command and is making great progress with "stay." I found myself happily in error last night when Chris placed a treat on the floor and instructed Shadow to "stay" away from it until he gave the "okay" command. Granted, he only stayed away for about two seconds... but I was floored he did it at all considering just two nights prior he made the toddler "terrible twos" look angelic.

On another happy note, the number and severity of indoor accidents decreased yesterday. In addition to me paying attention to when he eats/drinks and taking him out 10 minutes afterwards, Shadow has started trying to tell us (via telepathy, it seems) when he needs to go outside. Several times yesterday he flashed an adorable "look at me" face and stared at meas if waiting for something (without any indication that I had food). Upon going outside after that, he did his business asap (he's figured out that when he does, he can go back inside).

It seems we've developed some sort of doggy-human line of communication. The next step is to get him to do it even if we're not right next to him at the moment or don't read his mind immediately.

We're still working on the biting/nipping, and his increased comfort with us has led him to start testing his limits (such as trying to jump onto the couch). But he's made great strides for such a young guy already, and has proven that he'll eventually master everything so long as we tell him correctly and consistently.

Oh, and the best part? He actually allowed me time to exercise for the first time in a week by taking an extra long afternoon nap not on my lap. Life is good.

Progress Report: Day Five

Shadow naps on a sea of puppy training pads.

It’s 2:30 p.m. Wednesday (Day Five) and Shadow is conked out in his crate, snuggling with Leon the Lion and an old T-shirt bearing my scent. He’s been an angel all day, but I would have said that at this time yesterday too – before he had two accidents in a row, launched into a 25-minute fit while I was cleaning the first in another room, and became a berserk little devil each time Chris or I took him outside.

But it was a blip in an otherwise sweet and as-obedient-as-a-baby-can-be few days, and his sudden lack of eye contact told us he knew he had misbehaved.

Raising a dog from puppyhood is definitely shaping out to be a challenge, but the benefits (he just woke himself up by his own hiccups, looked at me with his sleepy blue eyes, and resettled himself with a tired sigh – so cute) far outweigh the frustrations.

Click here for a video of Shadow pouncing around his new home.

On the housebreaking front, the number of accidents has been decreasing each day. The main reason for that isn’t that we’ve trained him well (although today he’s been staring at me when he needs to go… maybe the beginnings of a signal?) but that Chris and I are getting better at recognizing when to take him out. According to the experts, puppies are too young to physically “hold it,” so it’s really up to us to be recognize the signs. From my observations, if his attention isn’t occupied by sleeping, playing, eating, or chewing… he needs to go out.

He just can't get enough of that coffee table!

As far as training goes, he already knows to “sit” on command! We accomplished this with tiny training treats (or sometimes bits of kibble so he doesn’t eat too much) and 5 to 10 minutes of repetition every day. Sometimes he doesn’t want to listen – he’s still very easily distracted – but generally he’ll plop down when we ask. Our next challenge is “down,” which is not coming as easily.

We’re also working on biting and nipping. He’s a puppy, so I wouldn’t expect any less, but it sometimes takes away the fun of playing with him. We started by responding with “No!” and yanking our hands away, but yesterday decided to start making a yelp or “ouch!” sound and shutting down for a few moments when he bit. At best, he’ll realize he hurt us and will stop. At worst, he’ll see that his plaything stops playing with him when he bites.

The biggest issue for Shadow, however, seems to be separation anxiety. This is extra frustrating considering I ACTUALLY AM WITH or near him 24/7 but occasionally want to shower, brush my teeth or get myself something to eat. (Selfish me.)

Until today, the second I left his sight and he couldn’t follow, Shadow went berserk. First there was the whimper, then the whine, then he’d try to test the pen by throwing his body against it. Soon he’d start to cry and bark. And after a few minutes, I would have a heartbreakingly hysterical puppy on my hands, sobbing the way human beings melt down and choke on their tears.

I knew from Cesar Millan’s book, “How to Raise the Perfect Dog: Through Puppyhood and Beyond,” that returning during his whimpers would only convince him that crying is the way to make his people come back to him. So I waited behind the adjacent wall for what seemed like an eternity (the longest lasted 25 minutes, the shortest 8), struggling to ignore the pain and mentally willing him to calm down so I could go back to him.

For Shadow to break his separation anxiety, he must get comfortable with the crate.

It’s without a doubt the hardest part of this so far. I’d rather clean up 100 accidents than listen to the little guy cry himself numb. But as my father-in-law told Chris the other night: It hurts your ears and your heart, but you have to do it. (And yes, I know it is practice for a human child… eventually.)

So today I cancelled any appointments I had scheduled over the next week. I am devoting every minute (I would say “waking” minute, but there’s no other kind these days) to helping Shadow break his fear of being alone when I have to tend to other projects in the house or run out for an hour.

Today, my technique has been moving him to the crate every time he falls asleep on me and relocating his meal spot from the kitchen to the side of the crate. He’s also gone into the crate on his own several times to sit or play – so far so good!

Each day, I’ll increase the time he stays inside with the door open, as well as with the door closed while I’m in the room. Hopefully by next week he’ll be able to sleep there rather than the much smaller carrier on our bedroom floor.

Check back for updates on this progress. Anyone going through a similar predicament may find it useful – I certainly would have.

I was warned that getting an eight-week-old puppy would be like raising a baby – that he wouldn’t sleep through the night, he’d need constant attention, he’d cry when left alone, he’d make messes, and at times I’d be completely dumbfounded as to what he wanted. And so far, all that has proven true.

But as any mother would agree, it’s all worth it. When he nuzzles his face into my leg, cocks his head to the side in confusion, follows me around like a shadow, or pounces around excitedly (the canine equivalent of a baby laugh in my opinion), it doesn’t matter how little sleep I get or how many accidents I have to clean.

Sweet Dreams

Shadow finally made it through the night without crying! It’s a gold star day!

After dozing in hour-long segments Saturday and Sunday, he slept from 10:30 to 5:45 a.m. last night with only one brief interruption (from movement, not from whining). That may not sound like much, but it gives me hope -- Hooray! No more under-eye circles! – that we’re doing something right and he is learning.

Right now he's in our bedroom in his carrier, but by the end of the week (maybe even tonight), we expect him to be in his bed in his crate in the adjacent living room.

Video: Check out Shadow's Small Screen Debut

Barely eight weeks old, Shadow the silver Labrador puppy plays with his new owners in his new home. Watch it below:

Monday, April 19, 2010

Shadow was the man of the hour today during his debut visit to our local vet, where he received a DHPP booster, a standard office exam, and medications to prevent heartworms, fleas and Lyme disease.

In addition to being a quiet but slightly fiesty big guy for the doc (Don't you just love the strong, silent type?), Shadow stole the hearts of all the women (who'd never seen a "silver" Lab before) and posed for a photo shoot welcoming him to the new veterinary community.

Despite seeing only Chris and I for two days, Shadow didn't show any fear meeting four new people all at once or being fussed with on a metal table. Truth be told, between the two of us, the award for most nervous vet visitor would probably go to me -- the woman who never owned a puppy before and who went to the appointment with a half dozen questions prepared on pink and white stationary.

For the record:
Getting a new puppy to the vet as soon as possible after he/she comes home is extremely important for the sake of both the pup and your purchase agreement with the breeder. As is the case of most pups from reputable breeders, Shadow was dewormed and had received the first in a series of DHPP vaccines by eight weeks of age. But the rest is up to the new owner.

Shadow Finally Arrives

A tuckered out Shadow sleeps under our coffee table.

It still seems surreal, but after 27 years of hoping and several months of uncertainty, I am finally the adoptive mother of a beautiful Labrador puppy.

My husband Chris and I picked up Shadow this afternoon from Blue Diamond Breeding, a New Hampshire company run by a wonderful couple who put us at ease after a fairly traumatic experience elsewhere.

It didn't take long for Shadow to warm right back up to us (see last week's post about our first meeting), to sink into our arms, and to curl sweetly into my lap in the back seat of the car.

Having heard stories about puppies crying the entire way home from the breeder, we were prepared for a miserable car trip. At first, getting him inside of the carrier seemed like an impossible task, but Chris had the brilliant idea of removing the top portion so it could act as a bed but not seem confining. It worked like a charm, and Shadow spent the next four hours sleeping half in my lap, half in the carrier bottom. And he was a perfect angel.

 

We couldn't have asked for a more well-behaved puppy on the ride home.

He's been a quiet fellow so far, and has spent the night sleeping, playing, exploring his new home and trying to figure out exactly what is going on. I'll expand on our first days together soon, but tonight the focus has got to be on Shadow. 

In the meantime, here are some more pics :)

Shadow bonds with Chris in his new home.

"Leon" the lion meets his playmate.

Soon after arriving home, Shadow curls up to ponder his new role and family.

Christmas in April! (for puppy)

Water bowls: check.
Leash: check.
An assortment of toys for him (us) to play with: check.

Anyone reading my monthly credit card bills might think I turned into a dog in early March. That's when all the Banana Republic purchases, all the electronics, and all the home accessories from Kohls disappeared... replaced by swipes at Petco, PetSmart, and the Pet Supplies section of Amazon.com.

Chris and I perused numerous books and articles to come up with our list of must-have puppy supplies. In making our purchases, we considered customer reviews, price, and availability. Then, like new parents fawning over baby shoes, we added a few (or several) as they caught our puppy-dog eyes.

Following is our ultimate survival list for welcoming a new puppy into a home.

(Standard disclaimer because, well, that’s what people do: I, as a simple novice dog owner, in no way endorse these products or take any responsibility for anyone using them… But they looked like good bets for me and my Shadow.)

A few good reads

1. Cesar Millan’s "How to Raise the Perfect Dog: Through Puppyhood and Beyond"

Neither Chris nor I started out as fans of Cesar Millan, a.k.a. "The Dog Whisperer." I only picked up the book -- audiobook, actually -- because of my nagging need to see for myself and discount things on  my own terms. A few weeks and several prolonged car trips later, however, I could confidently declare myself wrong.
While not a detailed guide to the daily workings of a dog's life (for that see below), Cesar Millan provides a great foundation for training YOU to train a dog. Unlike other authors who hang onto the outdated idea that dogs who disobey their owners should be punished -- Do they really understand why? -- Cesar Millan instead advises dog owners on how to elicit the desired behavior from their pets.

2. Kristin Mehus-Roe's "Original Dog Bible: The Definitive Source for All Things Dog"

For a day-to-day "how-to" guide, a reference for emergencies and answers to "I never thought of that" questions, this massive volume is sitting on our bookshelf -- right next to the thesaurus, "Writer's Market," and phone book.

Hardware

3. A video camera: Kodak PlaySport HD Waterproof Pocket Video Camera

We couldn't justify spending a ton on a full-size video camera, but this gets the job done for just $150 -- the price of one night out -- and is the size of a cell phone! (The fact that it's waterproof may be an unecessary frill, but I'll admit it sold me.) This is a must for showing cute videos of your new puppy to family, friends, and perhaps a legion of loyal blog fans...

4. A crate, such as: Midwest Life Stages Double-Door Folding Metal Dog Crate, 36"L x 24"W x 27"H

Crate training is all the rage, don't you know? This one is a cinch to set up and take down (for travel). The 42-inch is pretty massive, but it comes in all sizes and has a divider for when he's just a puppy. We don't anticipate needing it when he's older, but just in case, it was worth the extra couple bucks.

5. A pen: Midwest 552-30 30-By-24-Inch E-Coat Pet Exercise Pen, Black

Just like a playpen for toddlers, this will let us tend to tasks in another room without having to confine the little guy in his crate. Bonus: it attaches to the Midwest crate (see above), so he has the option to go to and from his bed as he desires. It's really like his own little house. ☺

6. Food and water bowls: Loving Pets No-Tip Dog Bowl

They come in plastic, stainless steel, and ceramic, and each has its pros and cons. I felt stainless steel was the best bet because it's durable (a must for both Shadow's chewing and my clumsiness), and because plastic can reportedly sometimes cause allergic reactions. The biggest fault seems to be that stainless steel gets hot in the sun, so choose a meal spot carefully.

7. Collar and lead

Once again, the choices abound -- from leather, nylon, and canvas, to harness, buckle, and snap-around. It took Chris and I two visits to Petco to figure this one out, but we settled on a small AND medium (just in case) nylon buckle collar and a six-foot nylon lead. This (along with some of the toys) we had to buy in person because it's pretty personal and because... well... it's part of the fun!

8. A carrier:  Petmate Pet Taxi Traditional Kennel, Large (Pets Up to 15 Inches Tall), Light Gray

Depending on your dog's size, you might be able to combine this and the crate, but we needed a small carrier for car transport as well as a crate for the house.

9. A bed: We're using towels the first few weeks, so Shadow can pick out his own bed as a housebreaking prize down the road ☺

Protection

10. Grannicks Bitter Apple spray

Nothing's guaranteed to save your furniture from sharpening canine teeth, but word from several colleagues and a few pet store employees was that this stuff is the best bet. I'll be dousing the house right before Shadow sets his curious paws inside this weekend.

11. Something to cover the floor: Grabber Outdoors Original Space Brand All Weather Blanket: Blue, Box

This is billed as a waterproof blanket that's easy to clean -- perfect for protecting the floors (especially when Shadow's visiting his grandparents).

12. Puppy pads: IRIS Neat 'n Dry Floor Protection and Training Pads for Puppies and Dogs of All Ages, Regular, 100-Count (Packaging Varies)

Yeah, it's a dirty job, but it's part of the housebreaking process. We're using these not as training tools, but as extra protection in case of accidents. Gotta keep the floors sparkling!

13. Cleaner: Nature's Miracle Stain and Odor Remover

Last of the nitty-gritty, I promise. But if there's one thing all the experts are in agreement about, it's that you can't wipe down an accident with any old household cleanser. You might not smell a thing, but he will, and he'll equate it with a place to... well... do it again...

Hygiene

14. Toothpaste and toothbrush: Petrodex Dog Dental Care Kit

This came with both the toothpaste and the brush. I'm sure the first time I use it will make for an interesting post -- keep an eye out!

15. Oral hygiene chews: C.E.T. Enzymatic Oral Hygiene Chews, Petite Dogs, 30 Chews

These I stumbled upon and figured if something Shadow eats can remove plaque and make my brushing his teeth easier, it's worth a shot!

16. Brush: Ultimate Touch Gentle Slicker for Puppies

Gotta keep him looking pretty! This one's made for puppies, so hopefully it won't yank his gorgeous silver locks.

17. Plastic bags for being a good neighbor: Bags on Board Regular Bag Refill Pack, 120 Bags

Sure, you can use regular shopping bags, but aren't these so much prettier?

18. Nail clippers (we're waiting to speak with the vet on this one)

19. Shampoo: Synergy Groomer's Blend Oatmeal Protein Shampoo

Oatmeal and no reports of tearing are the reasons I chose this for Shadow's first post-breeder bath.

Grub!

20-22. Treats for training and for everyday use. For his first few weeks, Shadow's dessert menu will consist of:
                           

























23. Bully sticks

These are billed as being better for dogs' digestion than rawhide. Cesar Millan seems to be a big fan; let's see if Shadow is too.

24. Puppy food (consult your breeder for this) and a canister to hold portions of it for easy serving

Play time!

25 & Up.  Toys -- and lots of them!

Here are just a few items from our current collection, which will be growing in no time:


























In a few days, all these purchases will finally be of use as we welcome Shadow to our home. Check back this weekend for photos... and maybe even a video -- if Shadow hasn't run us down already!

All's Well That Ends Well

We could call him “Miracle” or “Lucky,” and it would be just as fitting. But Saturday, Chris and I found our Shadow – and this time he’s not an illusion.

After reeling from the failure of our agreement with the first breeder, we put feelers out to all silver lab breeders within driving distance (a new “must”) in search of puppies needing a home. While to some extent we had started to psych ourselves out of having a puppy anytime soon (an emotional defense mechanism), deep down the truth was we still wanted him.

For two months we’d carefully picked out toys for him to play with, a crate and playpen to be his “room,” a collar and a little engraved nametag in the shape of a dog bone. We’d finally got around to our yard work – not because we particularly cared about having a leaf-free lawn, but because it would be best for him. We’d cleaned the house with extra precision – not cutting the usual corners – and “puppy-proofed” any room to which he’d have access.

Most of our inquiries came back negative: “I JUST sold my last silver; I’m so sorry!” or “We’re not planning on having another litter until the fall.” I worried that we would yet again have to deal with a long-distance relationship, never meeting the breeder and having to ship our puppy home.

But, like in love, all I needed was one.

The new breeder was within driving distance, had two silver males and several charcoal puppies ready to go home next weekend, and sounded extremely friendly and knowledgeable on the phone. She invited us to visit this weekend, to meet her and her husband, to see where the dogs lived, and to pick out our puppy in person.

Did I just hear angels singing?

We jumped at the chance, showed up first thing Saturday, and were suddenly in puppy heaven.

For an hour, I sat on the carpeted basement with a horde of excited seven-week old silver and charcoal puppies climbing into my lap, licking my face, pawing my shoelaces, wrestling with my pant legs (and each other), and launching adorably curious expeditions under tables and behind storage baskets.

It was extremely hard not to want all of them, but singling one out wasn’t hard at all. In fact, he chose us.

The tolerance for being held ranged from about .02 to three seconds with most of the pups, but the little silver guy wearing the pink and blue yarn necklace just sank right into me, looked up, and licked my face. Bounding away once in a while to launch some chaos with his brothers, he continuously found his way back to my lap, as if I had become his home base.
Chris looked at me, then the puppy, and his expression said it all. “This is the one.” Without a doubt, after all the pain of the last few months, after the emotional roller coaster ride and the doubt and the sleepless nights, finally we had found our puppy.

We said farewell to the little guy and his parents with soaring hearts, confident in knowing where he would be for the next week, and where he would be for years to come thereafter.

Now it’s time to get re-ready for his arrival ☺

What I Know Now

As a newcomer to the world of pet adoption, I assumed common sense would get me through the first stages of finding and entering into an agreement with a breeder. Alas, the guidebooks I consulted a little too late and the events of the following months proved me wrong. The result was a little egg on my face, a lot of heartache, and a desire to help the same thing from happening to anyone else. After all, a mistake isn't a total waste if a lesson is learned, right?

Things to consider (I wish I had!) before entering an agreement with a breeder:

- During your search for the breed you have chosen, consider distance from your home carefully.
The online world is small, but the real world is large. Stumbling upon a web page showing the most adorable schnauzer puppies is not enough.
There are many options to consider when buying a dog, but being able to drive to and meet the breeder in person should be double- or triple-weighted. Humans are pretty perceptive, but there is only so much we can gauge over the phone. Physically meeting a breeder, seeing where the puppies will spend their first eight weeks of life, being able to pick up your pup rather than shipping him as plane cargo, and having the option of jumping in the car should there be an emergency or other major concern (rather than sitting miles away at the mercy of the breeder’s willingness to call you)… is absolutely invaluable.
If you’ve done everything in your power but can’t find a breeder nearby, ask for several client references as well as the name and number of the vet they use. And contact them!

- Get a detailed description of how the pups will be cared for.
That means how and where they will sleep; who will attend to them during the day and how often they will be handled and played with by humans; what sort of medical regimen they will be given and by whom; what shots and treatments they will have received by the time they enter your home; whether their dew claws will be removed (if that is important to you), and what sort of health guarantee the breeder provides (if they don’t, move on because health guarantees are extremely common these days and extremely important).
Keep in mind that some breeders do give their own shots, but the puppies should still physically see a vet. Don’t blindly trust if your gut feels uncomfortable with the way something is being done. You may only have to deal with the breeder for two months, but you'll have the dog they give you for another 15-or-so years.

- Find out when the breeder usually sends pups home, and what happens if a puppy gets sick and has to stay a bit longer. Also inquire as to whether this has happened before, and whether any of their dogs have had major health problems after being placed in their new homes.

- Find out how accessible the breeder is.
It is not always a great indicator, but if you are being neglected before you even put down the first payment, signs are you’ll be sitting on pins and needles for two months wondering when and whether you’ll be getting your puppy. Trust me, it's not a good feeling.

- Find out what will happen to your payment and your deposit should something go wrong.
Get this in writing. Also, you should not be asked to pay the entire sum until the puppy is on his way home.

Finally...
When gathering all this information, it is extremely important to speak to the breeders directly, so you can better gauge how sincere they are and what is driving them. If your gut tells you to walk away, there is most likely a very good reason and you should listen.

Again, you are making a very long commitment to this dog, and he deserves an owner who will stick with him no matter what. Make sure you're comfortable with the entire situation before taking hold of that leash.

For a Reason

I’m not sure whether the belief that “everything happens for a reason” stems from wisdom or the human need to comfort those who are down, but either way I’m a fan.

Anyone who read Tuesday’s entry (click here to view) knows the anxiety Chris and I have dealt with over the past few weeks. Not wanting to put a blemish on anyone’s reputation or reopen the wounds that have finally begun to heal, all I will say is this: We will not be getting the pup we’d been expecting (he will be going to another very nice home), but we will be getting a puppy who will become our Shadow and who we will love for years to come.

With heavy hearts, we began our search anew Tuesday night, hoping to find a breeder closer to us – a place we could actually visit, where we could meet the puppies, the parents, and the breeders with whom we would be placing our full trust.

After countless days of darkness, the light is seeping back in and the joy of a new puppy has returned. We have seen several beacons over the past 36 hours. We have been shown respect, compassion and understanding by many breeders. And we have left conversations feeling uplifted, hopeful and – most importantly – confident in their abilities. The road we are on now seems so right it could have been destined.

Please check back this weekend for more details and photos. To quote Jerry Seinfeld on one of the best sitcoms ever made, “The wheels are in motion; things are happening!”

Tomorrow I will also post a list of things that (looking back with that pesky 20/20 hindsight) we should have inquired about or realized from the beginning. One adage with which I whole-heartedly agree is that a mistake isn’t entirely worthless if a lesson is learned. And I would like more than one person to learn from our mistakes.

The Waiting (let's hope it really is the hardest part)

As much you probably want to see some cute new puppy pictures, I want to be able to post them so much more.

For the past week, Chris and I have been prisoners in our own lives, metaphorically held hostage by the unclear whereabouts of our puppy.

Most pups go home to their families at Week Eight. Like the second language window, it is critical that they are assimilated into their new families as soon as possible both for training purposes and to make the adjustment easier on the pup.

But our puppy’s eight week birthday has come and gone and we are still in anguish – agonizing over when we’ll finally see our Shadow and struggling not to give into the very real possibility that we never will.

It’s a possibility I cannot bear to even consider. But after several weeks being left in the dark for days at a time, fighting to remain calm and not give into the pressure, even my most positive thoughts have started to give.

When we first inquired about getting a spot in the early February litter, the breeder (who for now will remain nameless) was as accommodating as could be. She was thrilled that we were interested, touched by the loss of Chris’ dog Bumps two years ago, and said we “sound like exactly the type of people we choose to raise our dogs.”

Within 12 hours after initial contact, we’d exchanged 11 e-mails and a phone call, and had secured our spot (with the first of three payments) in the very next litter.

Then we celebrated. We were finally getting a puppy. I was finally getting a puppy, after 27 years yearning for one. Chris and I were going to be parents – “puppy” parents, sure, but that was all we wanted at the moment.

We were cautiously optimistic. We had claim to a silver male, but there was no telling how many puppies would be born or the ratio of male to female, silver to charcoal.

We told only our immediate families about the possible delivery. And for 18 days, we were like balloons ready to pop, so eager to jump for joy but unwilling to risk the pain that would come if we were wrong.

Finally, on February 2, one charcoal and three silver puppies – all male and all seemingly healthy – were born. For the next four weeks, we were addicts for the breeder’s Twitter page, checking 30 times a day for photos and videos of our puppy.

Can you imagine having a baby then being unable to see or hold it for eight weeks? Can you imagine relying entirely on someone else to even give you that ability? No, I’m not equating human babies with puppies, but for a young woman eager for a non-human companion to nurture and pass the time with, for a young man hoping to fill a hole left by the passing of his childhood dog, and for a couple aching to welcome a third family member, this has been torture.

The e-mails that came so easily when we were looking to spend our money became a trickle a few weeks after the birth. After five weeks, the Twitter posts stopped showing new photos of the puppies and instead dwelled on items like the death of Marie Osmond’s son; news articles either loosely or not at all related to dogs; and the breeder’s desire to get photos up on PEOPLEPets, whose Twitter bio is “Meet celebrity pets, see the cutest photos and create your pet's profile!”

We were getting nervous, but we both kept our fears to ourselves. We didn’t want to shake the other up or validate the concerns by saying them out loud.

But in late March, one week before their eight week birthday, Chris and I went away for one last vacation, knowing we’d be unable (and probably unwilling) to travel anywhere far away for a few months after Shadow’s arrival. I e-mailed the breeder a week before we were scheduled to leave, inquiring about supplies we’d need to order within the week to ensure our pup would be ready to go on March 30. A few days later, I e-mailed her again, reiterating that we would be leaving the country and really needed to get this done. Soon the panic began to shape, then anger.

We spent every day in the Dominican Republic either trying to connect to Wi-Fi or using it, checking our e-mail and hoping against hope that we’d hear something from her. Nothing.

When we landed back in the U.S., the pups were seven weeks old exactly. We called and e-mailed again. This time Chris placed the calls, because as terrible as it is, some people still pay more attention when “the man” gets involved. (A better subject for another time, perhaps.)

Finally, low and behold, she called us back. Our puppy was doing fine, she said. She was going to take him to the vet soon for a final checkup and he should be on a flight April 1, she said.

Then two of his brothers died, and the pangs of dread got more severe. Before it was a matter of when we’d see him, not “if.” Our hearts went out to those families who got phone calls in the middle of the night. But our Shadow was okay, and we just wanted him home so we could look after him.

Needless to say, today is April 6 and not only do we have no idea when he’ll come home, but we haven’t heard from the breeder since Sunday (and that phone call took many tries and many hours to create as well). There are a half-dozen voicemails and several e-mails from us, but no information has made its way back.

Sleep has not come easy the past few nights. We are struggling to stay as optimistic as possible, but our hearts are breaking. For me, it feels like someone is pressing on my chest, squeezing harder by the minute. We want him home.

We have not yet met in person, but Shadow has taken a large chunk of our hearts. And like the bed in the corner of our living room and the water and food bowls in the kitchen, those hearts will remain empty until he finally gets here.

Silver and Gold?

The question I get most often when telling friends about my expected puppy is: “So wait, what color is he again?”

Most people who know anything about Labrador retrievers – heck, even many who have owned Labs their entire lives – are under the impression that they come in three colors: black, yellow and chocolate.

Technically, they are correct.

The American Kennel Club recognizes these three coat colors as the breed standard (meaning they are considered full-blooded Labs and can join in AKC competition). But just as “blue” accurately describes a cloudless afternoon sky, the Atlantic Ocean, and Yankee pinstripes, so do “yellow, black and chocolate” encompass varying shades of Labrador.

This was news to me three months ago, when I stumbled upon one breeder's web site by a happy accident (or fate). My husband and I had been looking for a yellow Lab, a decision we reached after doing some research (see “Choosing the Breed”). While all three colors are beautiful and have their merits, we decided on yellow because it seemed to bring out a dog’s facial features best, would make finding ticks much easier, and would in a small way honor Bumps (see “A Shadow of Things to Come”).

But the second I saw that silvery gray face pouting up through the computer screen – anchoring the words, “Yes, Virginia… Silver Labs Are 100% Labradors” – all plans were out the window. I shot an e-mail to my husband (referred to hereafter as Chris) asking whether he’d ever heard of such a thing.

“No but they are really cute,” he wrote back almost immediately. “Best looking ones you’ve found as of yet!”

Almost the color of a weimaraner, I loved that it was unique. Most common dog breed in the U.S., sure, but his coat would set him apart.

Always a skeptic, however, I did my research. According to various breeders and American Kennel Club policy, “silver” Labradors are simply one end of the spectrum of shades known officially as “chocolate,” which can range from very light to very dark brown.

And there’s more! In addition to the familiar golden wheat color, “yellow” Labradors can also be “light cream” or “fox red,” and a matte hue known as “charcoal” is registered as “black.”

To a dog lover like me, this discovery felt like Christmas morning, like finding out your dream car just got a slew of shiny new swatches to choose from, or that Baskin-Robbins was launching an entire new line of your favorite frozen flavors.

Of course, there always will be party poopers, and some naysayers still cling to the belief that long ago a weimaraner and a Lab got frisky and started the whole conspiracy.

But while dogs can be disqualified from official AKC registration for a number of reasons, a silver, red, white or charcoal coat alone is not enough.

Either way, 12 hours after stumbling upon this plethora of new information… Chris and I had secured our spot in the next expected litter, between a silver damsel named Annie and a dashing young charcoal named Eli.

Choosing the breed

When my husband and I decided it was time to stop daydreaming and finally bring a dog into our home, the immediate assumption was that we’d get a yellow lab in honor of Bumps, his childhood dog who moved on to Doggie Heaven in 2008.

That sounded great to me, as Labs – like their friend the golden retriever – are known to be great family dogs and fantastic companions. But having grown up with my parents’ pre-Internet collection of Consumer Reports magazines, I’m simply incapable of making any large purchase without doing hours of research on every other possibility.

So off I went to the library, the World Wide Web, and the living room couch for marathon sessions of “Dogs 101” (a fantastic show that I, a regular Jane with no particular canine expertise, recommend for all aspiring dog owners).

Several breeds, some of which I’d never heard of, caught my eye in the process.

Aside from the golden retriever (in my view a Lab with longer hair), I fell for:

- the Alaskan malamute – two of the eight sled dogs in “Eight Below” (see Sunday’s post for that story)

- the Rhodesian ridgeback – a stunning creature Animal Planet dubbed the “Navy Seal of dog breeds,” though perhaps too intimidating for a novice

- the beagle – possibly my favorite in terms of looks, but with a trinity of calls the neighbors might not appreciate

- and a host of terriers (the wheaten, the cairn, the Yorkshire and the West Highland).

My husband and I went back and forth, each exercising veto power until a clear winner remained. Anything that could fit into my purse (not that I’d ever put it there) was nixed immediately, and the rest followed. I guess that whole “go with your gut” lesson never stuck for us, because after weeks of research, we landed back at our initial choice, the Labrador retriever.

Yes, we ended up following the masses. The Lab has held the American Kennel Club’s title of “most popular dog” for nearly two decades straight. But I can shuffle happily knowing we’re informed followers.

Labrador retrievers are America’s canine sweethearts – and they’re not shy about it. Labs have stolen the spotlight in films and TV shows like “Marley and Me” and “Lost” (don't even pretend you didn't get choked up when Vincent was wandering alone in the dark jungle during Season One). They've pounced across your TV screen as spokesdogs for products like Cottonelle. They've earned accolades as assistance and explosives detection dogs throughout the world. And they've even yanked media attention away from political figures like President Bill Clinton and Russia’s Vladimir Putin.

Of course, any friendly furry face would be welcome in my home. But each breed is unique and it’s important to choose one you can live with for 15 years. If you bring him home and find out he sheds too much, barks too often, has way more energy than you can handle, requires two hours a day of grooming, etc. … that’s not his fault, but chances are he’ll bear the punishment. So please choose wisely and humanely.

Once we'd locked in our breed, the next step was to choose a color. Imagine if you had these many choices with a child?!

According to the American Kennel Club, the recognized Labrador coat colors are black, yellow and chocolate. So how did we end up with “silver?” Stop by tomorrow to find out ;)